You Are Not Missing Anything
Last week I stepped away from everything for 24 hours.
Not because anything was wrong, but because something felt off.
I could feel myself getting pulled into my phone more than I liked—checking emails, scrolling social media, reading the news. And I didn't love the energy that came with it. It left me feeling restless and a bit scattered.
I also realized I was spending far more time looking outward than inward.
So I decided to step away from all devices and give myself the gift of being fully present… adding an extra layer of intention by doing it in silence.
Although it was only 24 hours—and I slept through 8 of them—it turned out to be an incredible experience, with a few surprises along the way… including some not-so-silent giggles and a big aha.
I chose to do this retreat on a Tuesday because my husband would be gone for most of the day, and I knew he'd be a big distraction.
The day was loosely mapped out. I had some journaling prompts ready, a few verses from the bible that I thought might offer something to reflect on, and plans to go for long walks, do some yoga, meditate, eat beautiful food… maybe even do a puzzle or some painting.
No “productivity” was allowed — no chores, no work, no personal or professional development reading. And of course, no screens of any kind.
After slowly enjoying my morning latte, I picked up the bible and read a random verse that didn't sit well with me. Without even thinking, I said out loud, “That's BS.”
Which immediately caused me to gasp and cover my mouth.
Which then made me laugh. Out loud, of course.
Not only had I broken my vow of silence before 9:00 AM… I had also just sworn at the bible.
Not exactly the peaceful, spiritual start I had imagined — but very human I suppose.
Thankfully, the day got better. Much better.
Although it was still a bit cool here in the mountains, it was a beautiful day and I ended up spending most of it outside — walking slowly or sitting in a field.
At one point, as I was walking through the tall grass, I found myself reflecting on something I've been asked many times:
“Why are you so happy?”
I've answered that question in different ways over the years. But the answer that came to me in that moment felt really clear. And honestly, a bit surprising.
It's not because everything in my life is perfect.
It's because I've learned to slow down enough to actually notice my life.
Six years ago, I started walking in nature every day. I had always loved being outside, but before that, it was something I squeezed in when I could — maybe once or twice a week if my schedule allowed.
Shifting to a daily walk was really the beginning of me intentionally slowing down. And to be honest, it wasn't easy at first. I was used to being busy, productive, always moving. My to-do list was a mile long, and I had fully bought into that “push hard” way of living.
I'm so grateful I had the guidance of my coach at that time, gently nudging me toward something very different. I didn't realize then how much that shift would change the trajectory of my life.
The shift from overwhelm and anxiety to a sense of calm happened fairly quickly. The inner peace came first, and from there, the clarity followed.
But what I didn't expect was how much my whole rhythm would change. Over time, I just kept slowing down. And now I can see so clearly that slowing down is actually the reason I'm so happy.
I'm noticing my life in a way I never did before.
And it turns out, the simplest moments are often the most meaningful — because there are so many of them when you're actually paying attention.
Interestingly, the day after my silent retreat, I was on a call with one of my clients. She originally came to me because she wanted to feel more joy in her life. At first, she thought she needed to find a new sense of purpose in retirement.
But on our call, she shared that she's been feeling really happy lately.
Not because anything big had changed — but because she's been slowing down, not trying to cram so much into her days, and noticing the simple pleasures more.
Hearing her say that felt like a quiet confirmation of what I had just realized the day before.
Happiness doesn't come from doing more or striving for more.
It comes from being present and noticing what's already here.
I think so many of us are moving through our days so quickly that we don't even register the moments that could bring us joy.
That's one of the reasons I love sharing a simple practice with my clients called Joy Spotting. It's exactly what it sounds like — paying attention to the little things throughout your day that bring you joy.
To deepen the practice, I often suggest keeping a Joy Journal and, at the end of the day, reflecting on those moments.
Sometimes it looks like a story. Sometimes it's just a list.
Here's an example from one of my days:
Things that brought me joy today:
A steamy latte on the deck in the morning sun
An unexpected kiss from Tom
A mother deer and her two fawns on the path
A friendly conversation with the cashier at the store
Chilko, my sister-in-law's dog, running up to greet me with her tail wagging wildly
The birds singing in the bushes
The butterflies on the “butterfly bush” (that name alone makes me smile)
The feeling of rich cream massaged into my skin
The pink sky at the end of the day
There's nothing big on this list, and yet it's full of love and joy. Which is everything.
I'm so glad I gave myself that 24 hours of silence. It helped me see something that feels so simple, and yet so easy to forget — how closely our happiness is tied to the space we give ourselves to just be.
To slow down.
To notice.
There is so much here, when we're paying attention.
Perhaps the question I can leave you with today is:
What if nothing is missing in your life?
What if what you need is already here… just waiting to be noticed?
If something in you is stirring and you feel like you'd like to explore this more deeply, I offer 1:1 conversations. It's a quiet, no-pressure space to slow things down and bring some clarity to what's coming up for you. You can use this link to contact me.
And if you feel called to step away more fully, my Epona Rise retreat this August is a beautiful space for this kind of work.
Here's to slowing down… and noticing the beauty that's already part of your life.
With love,
Anita
